Back to life in New York....

...but embarking on another circus adventure!!!

Yes, as Giffords Circus co-director David Hibling put it: "Carolina, you'll never get the sawdust out of your heart." I just finished watching the PBS special "Circus" a beautiful documentary on the 2009 Big Apple Circus show, and during the last episode I found myself crying-well-sobbing tears of sadness and joy. I am truly blessed to have been part of such a special circus adventure with England's Giffords Circus this year, and it's an experience I'll take with me for the rest of my life. Even though I wasn't born into the circus like some of the performers in the documentary, I feel very much a part of it now that I have experienced one run in a circus.

We left off in the last post with me being back in London. It's hard to believe that was only two months ago, as so much has happened since! The vacation was a well-deserved and lovely break where I was able to visit friends and family in Paris and Amsterdam. We even had a mini Giffords reunion in Paris with a few of us performers who were either home in Paris or visiting, which helped to ease the pain of being pulled away from the circus so quickly. I practiced my French, shopped, went sightseeing, saw shows, explored on bike, and ate local cuisine and at the end of it I was ready to head home as it had been about six months since I began circus rehearsal. I'm now back in New York modeling, doing extra work for tv and film, auditioning and taking dance class, and temping a bit too. Above you'll see some of my recent modeling work, and there's more on my website. Things are back to the way they were before I left for the circus, but I wouldn't say I'm the same person. I've grown so much as a person and a performer that I believe I can tackle things with more integrity and curiosity but above all without fear.

Also, the funny thing is it seems as if David's prophecy came true: within a few weeks of being back to the City I found myself being called back for the dance company Pilobolus' 2010 circus tour through Europe. Had I landed that I would have been touring Europe for over a year with rehearsals beginning immediately in Austria. It would have been too soon for me to head back out, but it was a huge boost of confidence to have made it that far! Then the PBS "Circus" ads were floating around New York including smacking me in the face on my daily subway commutes around the city. Last but not least came the confirmation that I begin rehearsing for "Barnum" the musical in Connecticut right after Thanksgiving...which reminds me that I need to get my upper body into shape! Despite my nerves on working on the silks next week, I'm newly inspired by the beautiful four-part documentary I just finished, and I have a silk foundation thanks to my experimenting with them in the evenings at Giffords Circus. I know what to expect and I welcome the challenge of becoming an aerial dancer.

It's a new Carolina Ballerina, perhaps a Carolina the Circus Ballerina! Either way, I have so much to be grateful for this Thanksgiving and I continue to be humbled by the opportunities I've been presented with. I will do everything I can to keep working hard in my craft as I know now that a life without performance is a life I don't want to be in (at this stage in my life). I am so excited for the possibilities that lie ahead! Thank you Giffords, PBS, and God for these blessings. Thank you to my friends, family, and boyfriend for their love and support! Happy Thanksgiving everyone, may you all have a fantastic holiday filled with warmth and joy.

With love,

Carolina the Traveling Ballerina

Where There's a Will...

...There's a Way.

I am now back from London and had such an adventure on the last few days. Last Monday I went up to Gloucestershire, England (an hour and a half North of London) to sign the Giffords Circus contract. I did just that as well as getting a full tour of the farm where the circus rehearses, and I saw the vintage caravans we will be living in. What a beautiful, imaginative, and magical job this is about to become! I looked at their website and archives of past shows, and the costumes are to die for! The newspapers and magazines in England come from far away to see the circus and photograph it. Another thing I loved was the British humor (or "humour") from everyone I met. They are all just like my British father and the silly phrases they used were all too familiar to me. As my boyfriend says: I will be in touch with my British side...and I couldn't be happier.

I am also thrilled to be dancing (and assistant rehearsal director) for a type of project I have yet to embark on: a circus. My past projects have consisted of movies, music videos, modeling, musicals (including "Evita" at the Ivoryton playhouse in Connecticut where I played the tango dancer...one of my favorite roles to date), and concert dance performances.

On the plane ride from Heathrow to JFK last night I watched two movies which both used the saying "where there's a will there's a way." Coincidence, eh? I certainly thought so. The movies were Jennifer Anniston's "Love Happens" and the new Vanessa Hudgens film "Bandslam." In the former of the two films Jennifer's character takes Aaron Eckhart's character to a concert in an unconventional way: via cable-repair truck (where they both are lifted in the little bucket raised into the air by a crane parked just outside the concert) due to a lack of ticket availability. In the latter film Charlotte uses the phrase to refer to her best friend Will managing her band. It got me thinking how grateful I am for the opportunity to take on freelance jobs the way I do, and it is because of my persistence despite the constant rejection one learns to take when in the entertainment industry. As Jay-Z says in his new song Empire State of Mind: "If you can make it [in New York] you can make it anywhere." Thank you, (Sinatra) for your wisdom it certainly rings true!

I'm looking forward to recovering from jetlag this weekend and catching up with my wonderful New York friends. Home sweet home, New York City! Au revoir, London...see you in April!

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